


A Matter of Survival

by pantswarrior



Category: Eroica Yori Ai o Komete | From Eroica with Love
Genre: Blanket Fic, Crack, Gen, Humor, Locked In, Sharing Body Heat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2012-10-02
Packaged: 2017-11-15 11:11:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/526658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pantswarrior/pseuds/pantswarrior
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It might be the only chance they have to survive, being locked in a freezer together, but one of the two men is not okay with the idea. And not the one you'd expect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Matter of Survival

The two of them, the thief and the major, were both sitting hunched up and shivering against the wall of the freezer, trying very hard not to think about anything at all. Wrapped in the thick cape he'd fortunately happened to be wearing solely for dramatic effect, the thief raised his head slightly. He glanced over warily, then looked away again.  
  
Klaus saw this out of the corner of his eye, and tried not to think about _that_ , either. He knew exactly what Eroica was thinking - not just because it was Eroica, but because he was thinking the same thing. It might be unavoidable. They had, after all, been locked in a freezer together. And it was cold. It was very cold. Well below zero. He couldn't stop shaking, he could see his breath...  
  
Klaus lifted his head slightly, glancing at Eroica warily, then looked away again. They'd been playing this game for half an hour now - ever since they'd decided to stop yelling at each other over who was more to blame for this particular incident.   
  
A few minutes later, Eroica glanced at him again, then hurriedly turned his head away when Klaus looked back. Klaus was tired of fighting it. "...Fine."  
  
Eroica looked over again. "What?"  
  
"Fine," Klaus repeated, speaking slowly and haltingly through chattering teeth. "We'll have to..." He ground his teeth. "...share body heat."  
  
"Oh..."  
  
Funny how Eroica didn't look happy about that. Well, Klaus didn't care - he'd made up his mind. It was just a matter of survival, and couldn't be helped, no matter how repulsive. He would have expected the thief to be more enthusiastic, though.  
  
Klaus scowled at him. "What are you waiting for?" Now that he'd decided on a course of action, he was impatient to get it over with. "Take off your damn foppish clothes and get over here! We can use that ridiculous cape of yours as a blanket."  
  
Eroica froze, just staring at him in disbelief. "Look, it's not like I _want_ that," Klaus growled. "There's nothing I want _less_. But who knows when my men will find us? We're going to die here before long if we don't do something. So just take your clothes off already."  
  
"Not here!" Eroica protested. "Not in front of you!"  
  
"Why the hell not?!" The cold was making Klaus even more angry. "You're _always_ trying to get us in compromising positions together - and now that we have a valid reason, you suddenly turn chicken?! Just take them off!"  
  
Eroica shook his head, looking alarmed. "Why not?" Klaus bellowed.  
  
"...Shrinkage."  
  
Klaus blinked. "...What?"  
  
"Shrinkage." Dorian made a vague apologetic shrug under the cover of his cape. "You know. Shrinkage."  
  
Klaus thought about this for a minute, and finally realized what he meant. At least the rush of blood to his face warmed him a little bit. "You idiot - this is serious business!"  
  
"I know!" Dorian exclaimed. "But it would be embarrassing for you to see me naked for the first time... like _that_!"  
  
"It's not like I'm going to _look_!" Klaus snapped at him. "Besides, what do you mean 'the first time'? It'll be the _only_ time!"  
  
"That would make it even worse!"  
  
Tired of the thief's vanity and desperate for warmth, Klaus just leaned over to pull the cape off him. "Stop being a big baby - are you going to do this or do I have to strip you myself?!"  
  
"What?!" Eroica protested, trying to escape the hands that tugged at his clothing. "I'll strip for you later, I promise!"  
  
"I don't _want_ you to strip for me later - I want your clothes off now so we don't freeze to death!"  
  
"No, no! Stop it, Major!"  
  
And thus it was a minute or so later, when the two of them looked up from where they were grappling on the floor at a sudden gust of warmer air. Still grasping at Eroica, one hand pushing him down on the cape that had fallen beneath them and the other having succeeded in pulling down his trousers, Klaus looked into the very startled eyes of Agents A and B, who had just opened the freezer door.  
  
B just stared. A gave him a smile which was much too cheerful - signalling that he was absolutely terrified. "Well, uh... We'll be back in half an hour, Major!" A said with a nervous little wave. "Carry on..."  
  
"...Wait!" The door slammed shut again in a hurry.


End file.
